Litterer Hall of Shame

I seen this guy at the Dollar General at like 9:47pm
place smells like off-brand candles and regret
hear this weird scraping noise near the craft aisle
think it’s just someone dragging a cart
turn the corner
see this dude hunched over a display
writing on cardboard with a fat black marker
not just writing… lettering
like full-on perfect bubble letters, shadows, highlights
on a $1.25 poster board
he looks up
eyes wide as hell, smiling like he just discovered fire
doesn’t say anything
just goes
“you ever see letters come alive?”
bro what
he turns the board around
it just says “CLEARANCE” but it’s the cleanest sign I’ve ever seen in my life
manager walks by
doesn’t even question it
just nods like this is normal
dude goes back to work, whispering to himself
“they gotta feel it… they gotta FEEL it…”
I grab my snacks and leave
next day I go back
every sign in the store looks professionally done
no employee has any idea who he is
clearance section never looked better tho

Im sad to say I ran into this individual yesterday! when i pulled up to Dollar General for a quick run,
I mean the parking lot already looks rough
cups, bags, random napkins everywhere
see this dude standing by the entrance
just smiling… holding a full trash bag
think “oh nice, someone cleaning up”
wrong
he slowly rips the bag open
and just starts dumping it everywhere
wind catches it
trash goes flying across the lot like confetti
I’m just standing there like ???
he looks at me, grinning way too hard
“gotta keep the ecosystem balanced”
bro what
he starts tossing individual pieces now
like he’s placing them carefully
puts a soda cup on a car hood
wedges a receipt into a bush
lays a chip bag dead center in a parking spot
employee walks out
pauses
just sighs and goes
“man… not again”
dude dusts his hands off like he just finished a masterpiece
“nature heals when you let it breathe”
I just go inside.
next day I come back
parking lot somehow even worse
I ask the cashier about him
they say
“we think hes on the that shit again…”
HE NEEDS TO BE STOPPED!!